American Horror Story: Freak Show - S4E10 - Orphans

Previously on AHS: Freak Show, ‘Tupperware Party Massacre’

I’m not sure what to expect out of tonight’s episode. It’s been kind of all over the place the past couple of weeks and I’m waiting for things to come together. And for Dandy to keep his damn pants on.

We open the show with yet another death. This one seems to be of natural causes – Salty died of a stroke. Pepper can’t handle it, but Elsa can’t be bothered. Richard says she has too much stress; Elsa tells him she wants him out of the camp. But alas, he has the “head of the network” lined up to meet with her. For a smart, canny, conniving woman, Elsa sure is a dumbass to believe a word out of Richard’s mouth. Yet she does. He offers to take care of Pepper while Elsa prepares for her big TV show meeting. Elsa stupidly agrees and Richard hacks Salty’s head off to display at the morbidity museum.

Del walks in on Desiree reading to Pepper and asks to talk to her. He begs her to take him back and Desiree turns him down. She shoos him away and tells Pepper she’s going to get ready for the show. Pepper loses her shit over being left and Desiree ain’t having none of it.

Desiree and Elsa kick back a few shots and Elsa starts telling the tale of how the show began. I’m hoping this isn’t an entire flashback episode because I need the current storylines to get a move on.

Back in the day, Elsa started out with the gypsies but soon wanted to run her own show. She ventured out to an orphanage and found Pepper. They make an instant connection over stacking blocks and Elsa brings home her first pet – or as Elsa puts it, her first “monster”, yet she says it was the first time she ever felt unconditional love.

She continues to acquire new monsters, but her original, Pepper, was lonely. Then along came Ma Petite. Awww, we haven’t seen her in a while. She was so dang cute. Elsa trades 3 cases of Dr. Pepper to acquire the little one (Seriously? That’s it?) and Pepper is temporarily satisfied with having her maternal needs fulfilled. But soon other needs kick in and Elsa finds Pepper her soul mate: Salty. But now that Salty has died, they decide that it’s time for Pepper to go back home.

Maggie is taking a healthy swig from her flask when Desiree and Theo (okay, he’s not Theo, his name is Angus) walk in. They ask for a reading on their future. Maggie says they have a fresh start somewhere out west with a white picket fence. They giggle giddily and then Maggie’s shots kick in and she shits all over their happy little dreams. Um, okay. Haters gonna hate, I guess.

But Desiree ain’t having none of this either. She calls Maggie out as Maggie is getting sloshed on the carousel. Maggie confesses that Richard / Stanley is not the Hollywood scout he says he is. That they’re business partners. Desiree asks what they want with the show and Maggie claims they pick the audience’s pockets. Desiree calls bullshit and tells Maggie she will kill her if she finds out Maggie had anything to do with the deaths that only started happening when they showed up.

Back in Maggie’s tent, the twins are waiting for her. They offer up their money to get a good lawyer for Jimmy. Maggie declines but they toss the money at her anyway and tell her to “do right by Jimmy.” The kid is an alcoholic, emotional wreck. Why does every vagina on this show want him?

In jail, Richard comes to visit Jimmy. He asks Jimmy if he did it and Jimmy said he was too drunk to remember and he’s not sure if he killed the Tupperware party or not. Richard says he’s got a top of the line lawyer for him. Richard says the lawyer will need money, but Jimmy doesn’t have any. But Richard’s got an idea of how to raise the money. Of course he does that little skeeze.

Desiree is happily whipping up a pot roast and Maggie comes to talk and “do the right thing.” She wants to help Jimmy but she needs Desiree’s help to do it. And we have another commercial break. Is it just me or is this entire episode primarily commercial breaks? Hey, at least I haven’t had to look at Dandy’s ass at all.

Elsa has brought Pepper back to her sister. But sister don’t want her. Elsa says Pepper will die of loneliness if sister doesn’t take her. So sister agrees. Pepper tells Elsa “stay” but Elsa tearfully departs. Pepper looks so sad and pitiful but can’t articulate anything. She presses a kiss to Pepper’s palm and tells her if she’s ever lonely, to hold that kiss to her cheek and Elsa will be there. Oh God, this is the saddest scene. That barren, half-drunk sister of hers better not turn out to be a jackass. But at least she isn’t in danger of Richard killing her off.

Maggie takes Desiree to the morbidity museum where they see Ma Petite’s body and Salty’s head. But then the newest exhibit is revealed: a pair of lobster hands that must have been Jimmy’s. When Maggie sees them, she faints. I would too if my own personal magic orgasm fingers had been destroyed.

Flash forward to 1962. Pepper’s sister, Rita, is at a convent. She’s talking to Sister Mary Eunice – Lily Rabe! Yay! She’s got herself a deformed little baby that Pepper takes care of while she drinks gin and complains. Rita is telling a tale about Pepper having a drinking problem and an obsession with her husband and parading around naked. Sister Mary Eunice says the shock therapy and caning should help with that. Then Rita claims Pepper is a murderer, says Pepper killed her son. But it was really Rita’s husband. Sliced that infant wide open and let him drown while Pepper was giving him a bath. Pepper finds his bloody dead body and goes hysterical. And I’m practically hysterical. What the hell is this madness? Poor Pepper! How can anyone be that despicable and cruel? This is sick and twisted in the most depressing and heartbreaking way. I don’t like this one bit.

Pepper is locked away in a cell, wrapped in a straightjacket. Sister Mary Eunice comes to fetch her, angry at first, but then sees that Pepper is crying over dead baby Lucas. She’s overjoyed that Pepper is “learning her lesson.” She brings Pepper to a library of sorts and teaches her to sort the books. She calls Pepper her “special project” and Pepper seems somewhat happy. She finds an issue of Life magazine with Elsa on the cover (with a caption reading: Elsa Mars still owns Friday night. WTF?) and touches her palm (the one Elsa kissed) to her cheek and smiles.

Well, holy crap, that was sad! It was so emotionally charged with the Pepper scenes that I almost don’t care how little the main plot lines developed. My heart is broken, I’m intrigued with that Life Magazine cover and did you see the previews? Not just Neil Patrick Harris, but a completely whack-a-do Neil Patrick Harris is coming! And he’s such a loony that even Dandy refers to him as a “sicko.” Oh hell yes, AHS. Bring it on. But stop with the sad stuff. This episode had more than enough to last me the rest of the season. Vengeance for Pepper, damn it! Until next year…