American Horror Story: Coven - S3E10 - The Magical Delights of Stevie Nicks
Previously, on American Horror Story: Coven: “Head”
After a brief winter respite, AHS: Coven is back. And I’m hoping it comes in with a bang.
We start with Fiona and Marie. Fiona is giving Marie a stiff drink and offering up a spell to help her sleep. OMG can I just tell you how excited I am that these two are sharing more screen time? Anyway, Marie is thanking Fiona for her kindness. She’s relieved to have found an equal and they have so much to talk about. Oooh, girl, I can’t wait. But then Fiona leaves her and Marie’s docile grin turns to a slightly malicious stare. And I like it.
The room is dark and then I get the bejeezus scared out of me by what looks to be Busta Rhymes from the “Put Your Hands Where My Eyes Can See” music video. Marie is woken by… I’m not sure what. He’s got face paint and red eyes and dreadlocks and a top hat with skulls, and I think he was on that show Fringe. I dunno, but he’s freaking me out. He calls himself her master, and she pleads with him to come back another time. He takes a sniff of something that I think is probably not cocaine, and Marie collapses back onto the bed. He asks her what she’s doing in the house of her enemy, and she tells him she’s there for a truce. He says not without paying him his due and reminds her of a bargain she made long ago. I don’t know what he wants, but she better give it to him, cuz he is scary as shit. And that evil cackle to close out the scene ought to do nicely to keep me from sleeping tonight.
We cut to a hospital’s nursery ward. A nurse tries to stop Marie, but she blows white powder in her face, and the nurse lets Marie in as instructed. She chooses a beautiful little black baby whose name tag says Joseph Metzger. She cradles the baby in her arms and storms out into the night. Two foolish security guards attempt to stop her despite her warning. Then her eyes become white, her tongue flickers all lizard-like, and she howls like a banshee before the guards turn to each other and simultaneously shoot each other in the head. The baby cries and Marie tells it to shut up or she’ll give him something to cry about. The maternal instinct is not strong with this one.
Back at the house, the girls are in the kitchen watching the news coverage of the shooting. Cordelia blames herself. But Marie cuts off her whining and admits it was her fault. She tells Cordelia that her husband was a witch hunter whom she hired to kill them. Cordelia is upset, but Marie rationalizes that they were enemies and hey, he wasn’t successful. So, ya know, no hard feelings. Fiona storms over to the table and slaps Cordelia. She’s not pleased that her daughter was too blind to realize what her husband really was. Marie tries to pacify the situation and helps Cordelia off of the floor. But Fiona will not calm down. She knows witch hunters work in groups, and she wants to track down the leader of the pack. Woo hoo, this ought to be fun.
Next up is Misty, twirling around and singing (what I can only assume is Steve Nicks) in her room. Fiona enters and compliments her on her talents. Misty is not flattered. She tells Fiona that even if Fiona kills her, she has plans to bring herself back. Fiona swears she would never. Of all the girls in the house, Misty is the only one with magical talent that’s worth a damn. Misty is not fooled. But Fiona works her irresistible charm, and Misty starts to buy into it and follows Fiona through the house. They find a blonde woman admiring a painting and, lo and behold, it is none other than Stevie Nicks. Misty passes out right onto the floor. Can’t blame her. If Christina Aguilera showed up in my living room, I’d probably do the same thing. Fiona laughs and tells Stevie she owes her five bucks.
The girls are walking back into the house and Madison recommends looking for Queenie at Souplantation cuz “that bitch loves a bottomless bowl.” I had to laugh at that. Stevie Nicks is at the piano singing a song while Fiona and Misty bask in her rock goddess glory. Madison saunters over and asks when her favorite musician, Eminem, will be showing up. Fiona says Madison is not Marshall’s type, and she’s not the next supreme. Damn. I would love to see Slim Shady and Fiona get down. Misty begins twirling again and sits down at the piano bench until Stevie is done with her song. Then Stevie demonstrates the signature twirl and gives Misty her shawl, and Misty is the happiest person in the history of people.
Madison is pissed that Misty is the next Supreme when, hello, she came back from the dead. Zoe reminds her that, hello, Misty brought her back. Nan declares that she could be the next Supreme because her powers are growing. She can now do mind control. Madison dares her to prove it, and Nan commands her to stick a cigarette in a place fiery things do not belong, but Zoe cuts them off. She tells Madison that her heart murmur prevents her from being the next Supreme, but Madison claims that having died and being brought back cured it. Nan listens to Madison’s chest and confirms it to be true. Madison says she wants to go up against Misty in the Seven Wonders, so they can find out who the next Supreme really is.
Cordelia comes to Fiona and Marie with information on Hank’s father and his company. The corporate headquarters are in Atlanta, and Marie wants to hop on over there. But Fiona has another plan. She wants to take them down from the inside out. She concocts a spell to rob the company of its money. Cordelia asks to help, but Fiona forbids her. She calls Cordelia hopeless and useless and asks her to get out of her sight. Cordelia runs away crying. Sorry, Cordelia, but Fiona’s kinda right. Marie and Fiona cast their spell using a maze and some white rats. FBI agents flood the DelPhi offices and seize boxes of information. A rat finds its way to a trap and, as it snaps, Fiona goes faint. Marie asks if she’s alright just before Fiona collapses.
Zoe and Nan are in a hospital elevator declaring that Madison can’t be the next supreme because she’s “mean and a whore.” Considering how well those traits have served Fiona, I’d say that’s a weak argument, but okay. Nan says she’d only do good things if she was a Supreme and Zoe agrees. Which is why Nan is never going to be the Supreme - cuz that’d just be boring as hell. They tell the nurse they’re there to see Luke, and she sadly informs them that he died yesterday and the body was already taken. Nan breaks down in tears.
At the house, Marie is burning some foul smelling incense to clear the air of the evil intentions. Fiona explains that her sickness comes from the rise of the new Supreme. Marie said she doesn’t accept that. They still have work to do. Fiona asks Marie to give her eternal life. She denies her. Fiona asks how Marie was granted hers, and Marie says she sold her soul to that freaky dude. She unknowingly traded her child, and a child every year thereafter, in exchange for her own eternal life. Marie tells Fiona that if she wants him bad enough, he will hear her and he will appear. But to try and get some sleep. Judging by the look on her face, I think Fiona is gonna get a visit very soon.
Misty and Madison are at the back end of a processional, eating some sort of meat on a stick. Misty thinks it’s awesome, Madison tells her to get used to it: as the next Supreme, she’s going to be surrounded by anything and everything she could ever want. Misty doesn’t buy into Madison’s taunts. Madison admits she thinks Misty is stupid, but offers to show her something. They make their way into the cemetary and enchant the gravediggers. Madison lifts the lid of the coffin, and the man inside rises up and steps out, very much alive. Madison tells Misty to get rid of Stevie’s shawl, to stop being an imitation of some other witch, and just be herself. She tells Misty to throw it in the now empty casket, and Misty almost obliges. But just as she pulls the shawl back to her, Madison whacks her over the head with a brick and shoves her into the casket and snatches the shawl before closing the lid. She drapes the shawl over herself and disenchants the gravediggers. They lift the casket that now carries Misty and slide it right into the tomb.
Nan and Zoe pay a visit to Luke’s mom. She serves them each a cupcake and tells a story of how cute Luke was. Nan blurts out the question of where his body is and Zoe rephrases it to where she intends to bury Luke. Smooth. His mom says he’s there, now. Ew, weird. But then she whips out an urn of his ashes. Nan loses it. She knows mama killed Luke with the pillow, and she intends to make her pay. She forces mom to her knees and whips out a bottle of bleach. Zoe tries to stop her, but Nan just flings her aside. Nan makes mom pour the bleach down her own throat, wanting her to be “cleansed.” Damn.
In the greenhouse, Myrtle is playing some weird-ass instrument - the kind that makes those horror movie “woooo” sounds. —[Editor’s note: the instrument was a theremin]- Cordelia asks her to stop, but Myrtle tells her not to “hate.” Cordelia wails about her uselessness, Myrtle tells her to suck it up. And to bottle her salad dressing, cuz it’s amazing. Cordelia loses it and calls herself a failure and starts breaking everything. Myrtle watches in disdain and then goes back to her instrument.
At the DelPhi headquarters, things are not good. They’ve lost 50% of their assets. And Harrison knows the witches are responsible. And he intends to deal with them.
Fiona is cutting up some white powder onto a mirror and chanting. Oh Lord, that freaky ass man is coming, isn’t he? Oh Lord, there he is. He scoops a bump onto his pointy green nail and takes a sniff, then compliments Fiona on breaking out “the good stuff.” Fiona gets straight to business and wants to set the terms of the deal: her soul in exchange for eternal life - no aging, no “decrepitude.” He agrees. She tells him to seal it, and he gives her a kiss, then says the deal is off. She has nothing to sell: she has no soul. And then he’s gone. But saxophone man is back. He says they’ll get her eternal life. They just have to find the new Supreme. Fiona one-ups him: she has no soul, so to hell with it, let’s just kill ’em all!
Nan and Zoe are in their room, and Zoe is surprised that Nan was able to get into Luke’s mom’s head. That was something only Fiona could do. But Nan says Fiona’s a bitch, and she’s gonna be a nice Supreme. Cuz death by bleach ingestion is just sweet as pie. Nan hears a noise and goes to investigate. She finds a baby tucked away in Marie’s closet and pulls him out. Marie storms in and demands she put the baby down and realizes that Nan is clairvoyant. Nan tells her to “eat her shit.” She just killed the neighbor lady, and she will kill her, too. “Nice Supreme” my butt, more like “Bi-Polar Supreme.” She declares herself the next Supreme just as Fiona walks in. Fiona orders her to give the baby to Marie and then kicks her out of the room.
Marie says that Nan is dangerous and Fiona agrees. Fiona asks whose baby it is, and Marie tells her it’s for Papa, but that Fiona will understand soon enough. Fiona admits she couldn’t come to terms with him. Marie says his price is an innocent soul, once every year. Fiona suggests they kill two birds with one stone, so they drown Nan in the bathtub. Papa appears and says the price has not been met - Nan was not innocent. Fiona says she was: she killed the neighbor, but the bitch had it coming. Well, that is true. Papa says that Fiona and Marie together is trouble. Hell yeah it is, and I like it. He takes Nan’s soul, and they leave.
Stevie is back and playing the piano. Fiona drapes herself on the couch and cries as Stevie sings.
I gotta say, I am loving the Fiona/Marie dynamic here. And I love where things are going. It was exciting, it was creepy, it startled me a few times, and it made me laugh a couple times. For me, this was a solid episode that had everything i look for when I turn on AHS. And I look forward to next week.
Until then…
