Being Human - S3E12 - Always a Bridesmaid, Never Alive
The penultimate episode kicks off with Sally laid out of Donna’s (The Soup Kitchen Witch) table, marked up like a cow ready for slicing. She begs for her life, but Donna points out that Sally’s body was never really hers. As she prepares to stab her, Sally wakes up.
Aidan watches Kenny sleep his not-so-eternal sleep. I can’t wait to see what kind of vamp Bubble Boy turns out to be! Seeing as how the last vamp Aidan turned (Cat’s ex) ended up being a bit of mess, odds are that Kenny won’t be the cool, brooding, sexy Aidan-esque vampire.
Nora and Josh are getting married today! But first he must have the sads that none of his family will be there and that his sister knows his wolfy secret. She insists that his sister will come around. They are officially the cutest couple ever.
Aidan is like a vampire Nate Berkus! He has decked out the living room for the wedding and he’s making breakfast! *sigh* Cat arrives and she’s worried things will get all awkwardsauce since she and Aidan totally did it the other night, but he dipped out in the middle of the night (not a euphemism) and hasn’t called since.
Sally’s upstairs rotting away and practicing her Latin so she can handle Donna in the afterlife or wherever her new door will lead… well, know it leads to Donna. Anyway, Nora, Josh, and Aidan agree to send everyone away because rotting friend and newborn vampire aren’t exactly wedding friendly.
Oh, and Cat is Aidan’s girlfriend now. *yawn*
Aidan decides he’s going through the door with Sally when she dies. She’s going to need the backup because her Latin is pretty awful. Also, Aidan is awesome. Josh is going, too. Nora insists. They’ll get married when he gets back. If he gets back.
Now we get a fashion show! Nora kicks the boys out so she and Sally can find Sally the perfect death dress. After trying on some pretty hideous clothes, Sally has to take a seat in (thankfully) the least hideous because her body is on its way out.
Tears! The gang sits around Sally’s death bed. There’s jokes, hand-holding, and… so.many.tears. Someone was definitely cutting onions in my living room. They say their goodbyes. Sally dies.
And then Ghost Sally is back, feeling like herself again. Josh is the only one who can’t see her. They try to figure out what kind of weapon they can take through the door since Sally can’t hold things. Aidan figures they’ll need something from Sally’s body soooooo he plunges his hand into her dead chest and rips out her heart.
Welp. They’re ready now and just in time because the door appears. The gang enters. Josh is taken to the woods where he tries to connect with his wolf, but it attacks him. Aidan sees his son in a field and is attacked by him as well. They both wake up in the soup kitchen with Sally.
Ray (the werewolf Josh killed) is standing guard and he has a few words for Josh. Sally and Aidan continue on to find Donna. While Josh battles Ray, Sally spits Latin at Donna, who turns into a really old lady. Like, from the 17th century old. She was armed with a Truth-Facing spell. Well, how the hell is that helpful! Donna is super old now, but she’s still powerful and knocks out Aidan. Josh dispenses with Ray.
Aidan awakens and burns Sally’s heart, but all that does is give Donna a huge fireball to shoot at Sally. Their plan kinda sucks. As Sally burns, she tells Aidan and Josh each that she loves him and then Donna vanquishes Sally and eats her ashes.
Those ashes are the mother of Oil of Olay because Donna goes back to her normal-looking self. Which, by the way, wasn’t so young to begin with. But a bright light burns from within her and she explodes. The gang is transported back to Sally’s bedroom. They did it! Sally is still a ghost, but they did it! There’s still Sally’s dead, heartless body on the bed, but… you get the picture.
The wedding is back on after Josh’s sister arrives and says she’s willing to give his new life and friends a shot. The wedding is beautiful. And more tears!
But not everything ends well. Sally can now control fire, which scares her. Kenny is still turning in the basement and he doesn’t look good at all. And Liam shows up at the cabin where Nora and Josh are honeymooning.
Rut roh. Season finale next week, ProFans!
