King of the Nerds - S2E3 - To LARP or Not to LARP
Previously, on King of the Nerds: “Weird… Science?”
Everyone is sad that Josh is gone and even more sad that Zack is still there. Jack says he hopes that Josh has blocked Zack on Facebook and YouTube. I’m even more convinced that Jack is secretly 12.
So, all nerds are called to the court yard where Curtis and Bobby are dressed like jokers and ladies. Because this week is about Live Action Role Playing. LARPing is not a thing I have ever done or ever plan on doing, but… I could actually easily be talked into it. Anything negative I say about it is just jealousy talking. But if you say that to me, I’m just gonna deny it. Anyway, this week’s nerd war involves LARPing, of course. The two teams will be given the same four characters - a bard, a monk, a warrior, and a spell singer (whatever that is) - that they must each take on a roll of. The purple team has one too many members so one person has to sit out and Katie is the chosen one as she is unable to bend to the rules of improv which is a giant part of LARP.
Zack never shuts up, and I’m not sure how I had a crush on him last week. Even if it was only for about 30 minutes. The purple team works great together, but the yellow team is a mess, and it’s primarily Zack’s fault. He fails to focus, and when they try to get him to focus, he yells that if they try to push him away from the team he will drive the team into the ground and destroy each and every one of them. He accuses Mary Kate of scoffing when she was wasn’t and then says, “I will take you down today” and proceeds to storm out while calling the rest of the team idiots. Wow. Someone left their meds at home.
The judges for this nerd war are Kevin Sorbo, some girl who is half-naked, and Jon Heder. I love Jon Heder, and I met Kevin Sorbo at Wizard World last year; he was very nice. I have no opinion on this girl [Editor’s note: the woman is Yaya Han, a fantastic cosplayer.]
The yellow team has a Jack who has shaved his head and some very sporadic sword fighting. The purple team has some excellent costumes and definitely much better acting than the other team. If purple doesn’t win, I’m just gonna flip a table… and they win! Just as it should be. The purple team gets to go celebrate at some sort of pirate show while the yellow team prepares to lose another member.
Mary Kate says she will vote Zack into the nerd-off because with him around they spend more time talking him off a cliff than anything else and everybody is tired of his shit. Zack goes crazy and demands that Mary Kate tell him how gravity works, and then he laughs like he’s insane and storms around the room talking about annihilating his team. He’s kind of scary. I wonder if maybe contestants need to be tested for mental stability from here on out. His team does end up voting him unanimously into the nerd-off, while the other team votes for Mary Kate. She refers to Zack as a disease, and I hope that she eradicates him.
The nerd-off is a game of Battle Hammer, which both Mary Kate and Zack seem to already be familiar with. I’ve never played, but apparently, it’s like Battleship. Nobody wants to advise Zack or even practice the game with him, and he practically cries. It’s hard to sympathize with him when I saw him act crazy a few times already today. His tears get Chris to agree to help him practice and to advise him during the nerd-off.
A giant board is set up with all the pieces laid out. The objective is to destroy all your opponent’s pieces while also defending your own. The first person to get all their pieces destroyed loses. As each piece is destroyed, a little person with a hammer walks over the board smashing the pieces to bits. To make a long story short, Mary Kate had a huge lead and then lost it with some crappy dice rolls. Mary Kate must leave, and as she does, she’s squashed by a giant hammer. Too bad. I liked her.
The previews for next week don’t show any crazy Zack antics, but I guess we’ll find out then. See ya!
