True Blood - S5E6 - Hopeless

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Alcide is dragged through the halls by wolves. Bill is attacked by one. While Eric goes to help, Russell tries to bite Sookie, but she blasts him with her Fairy Fire.

Eric is about to kill Russell when Bill reminds him that if they bring him in alive, they may not have to die. Then, The Authority SWAT team shows up to bring him in..

Tara and Jessica fight in Fangtasia until Pam puts a stop to it. She tells Tara that she made her proud, but proud like a human proud of his dog when he doesn’t shit in the house.

As they drag Russell off, he swears there is no Lilith. “You might as well be praying to leprechauns, or unicorns, or motherfucking Kardashians!”

 

The head Authority Swat Guy Council member wants Sookie and Alcide glamoured so they don’t remember anything. Bill pretends to glamour Sookie, telling her that she won’t remember knowing him and she will live her life to the fullest. Eric glamours Alcide for real, telling him that he will protect Sookie with his life and that he won’t have sex with her because she disgusts him.

Effectively.Cockblocked.

 

Doug wants to be glamoured and he and the hostages tell ASGC that they can identify the woman who brought them there and helped Russell.

Wolf Emma runs to her Memaw’s house while Sam and Luna are rushed to the hospital. At Fangstasia, Hoyt tells Jessica that she still loves him. She shuts that shit down. He’s all, “Use me up, please. I don’t care!”

Terry and Patrick haul ass when they realize the fire demon killed the guy from last week whose name I can’t remember. Patrick is now a believer, but Terry is all, “Fuck you and your new beliefs!”

 

 

Jason has a weird dream about his Daddy. He vows that he will find the vampire that killed his parents. The vampire Authority guy eats the van full of survivors, including poor Doug. The next morning, Sookie realizes what Eric did and unglamours Alcide. He is pissed at Eric and Bill and storms out. No ass for Sookie.

 

At the hospital, Luna agrees to let Marcus’ mom care for Emma while she’s laid up since someone is apparently after shifters. Lafayette goes to see his Mom. She tells him that Jesus needs saving. She reminds Lafayette that all this weird shit started when they got messed up with Jesus’ crazy ass uncle. Then she reminds him that Jesus loves the little faggots. Tell that to Westboro Church.

Alcide challenges the new packmaster, JD, because he now remembers chasing him off the night before at the asylum. The pretty naked wolf girl from episode one agrees to be his second for the challenge.

Authority HQ: Everyone celebrates! Eric and Bill’s trackers are removed. Roman pops a bottle of really old, expensive blood. Eric still won’t admit that he doesn’t think humans aren’t good for anything but food and that he shares The Authority’s religious beliefs. Salome acts suspicious when Roman says he wants to interrogate Russell. Although, I think the Swat Council Black Guy is even more suspicious because if they believe they should co-exist with humans, why did he eat them?

Jason goes to Sookie at Merlotte’s and tells her about the fairy party and that Hadley told him a vampire killed their parents. Later, Jason and Sookie show up at Moulin Rouge. I mean, the fairy club. Sookie warns Hadley that fairies aren’t what they seem, but she doesn’t believe her.

Andy questions the owner of the weapons store, trying to find out who might have purchased wooden bullets. The owner tries to kill Andy, but Sam saves him. Terry admits to Arlene that he did something bad in war and that he and Patrick are in danger. He won’t tell her where he is going or when he’ll be back, but he’s leaving to keep her safe. Zzzzzz.

Hoyt is being drained in an alley and doesn’t even care that his heart is slowing down. The Obama-mask wearing posse show up, stake the vamp, and pulls Hoyt into their van.

Sookie doesn’t believe that a vampire killed her parents because he smelled her blood on a Band-Aid in their car. In Sookie’s defense, that’s a pretty stupid storyline.

She tries to unleash her Fairy Fury, but the other Fairies shut that shit down.

 

 

Russell is brought in to be executed while Eric visits Nora in her cell. She tells Eric that she didn’t release Russell, but God’s plan is finally happening. “She was right. She was right all along.” Eric senses a set-up. He rushes out, but is too late. Before Roman can kill Russell, Russell gets the jump on Roman and stakes him.