Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt - S1E10 - Kimmy is in a Love Triangle!
Previously on UKS, Kimmy Has a Birthday!
Logan shows up with a dolphin with a bow on it as an apology to Kimmy for the fight with Dong. Kimmy doesn’t know where she’d even keep the dolphin and Titus thinks it won’t stop looking at him. Logan admits that he got in the fight with Dong because he cares so much about Kimmy. He knows Dong cares just as much and wants Kimmy to cut him off.
Logan - I think I reacted that way because I really care about you.
Kimmy - Well, what would the Carebears say about how you show it?
Logan - It would depend on the bear, Kimmy.
When Kimmy goes to break things off with Dong, she finds that the entire Chinese restaurant, with the exception of Dong, has been taken away by immigration. They came there looking for Dong, so Kimmy takes him back to her place to stay. Dong eventually admits he can’t just be friends with her and leaves. Logan shows up to pick her up and admits he’s the one who tried to get Dong deported. Kimmy immediately dumps him and goes to stop Dong from getting on a bus. She likes him and wants him to stay. He thinks if they’re gonna date, they should get married just to be safe. She looks like she’d rather get on that bus.
At the Spooky Lab, Titus applies for the position of mad scientist, because he gets a monologue. They give the part to somebody else instead because Titus doesn’t come across as straight enough for the role. He is recommended to an acting coach who will teach him to pass as straight. But that guy takes one look at him and decides he has no potential to pass as straight. Titus gives the guy a “Bye, Felicia” and breaks a lamp as he storms off. The man stops him. That was his first lesson in acting like a straight man and he passed. They spend hours working together, by Titus never gets any closer to passing as straight. Until he’s practicing straight guy lines in a bar and some guy thinks he’s hitting on his girlfriend. It’s then that he realizes he can pass as straight. He just needed to believe in himself.
Meanwhile, a divorce lawyer has been hired to inform the kids that Jacqueline and Julian are getting divorced. Part of his job is to hug and comfort them. And then make them sign something that says he did indeed hug and comfort them. The boy is excited because now he gets two Christmases. Xan is mad and blames Kimmy because now she has to go live with her mom, step-dad, and their gross babies. Kimmy helps Xan chase her mom off by pretending she lives in some drug den of prostitution and her mother decides she can stay in New York with her father so she doesn’t have to deal with it. Kimmy realizes her mistakes and gets Xan’s mom to come back and take her home with her because her friends are a bad influence and Xan’s actually a pretty good kid.