Scream Queens - S1E8 - Mommie Dearest

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Previously on Scream Queens, ‘Beware of Young Girls’

After foiling the cops and being released from the asylum, Dean Munsch does what any depraved murdered would do, she takes a shower. Followed by being viciously attacked by two Devils and Justice Scalia (don’t ask). Instead of being another victim, she krav magra’d the shit out of her potential killers, who let her live to see another day.

The Dean finally makes good on her promise to Grace. She gives her a name: Sophie Doyle. And subsequently calls Grace out on her self-centered quest for “justice.”

The Chanels continue their fruitless search for clues to pin the murders on ZayDay and Grace. Chanel O has the brilliant idea to enlist the help of the Scotland Yard, whose detective work arm her with the name and photo of Grace’s real mother and a rash of insults flung towards Grace ending in a long-deserved smack in the mouth. Grace and Pete uncover the truth about Gigi’s ties to the whaling woman, Candle Vlogger gets murdered (RIP), and Boone makes a special appearance as Joaquin Phoenix.

Maury Says She is Not the Mother

After 20 years and 8 weeks, Grace is not the mysterious love-child of the dead sorority girl, but the child of another dead sorority girl, Miss Waterfalls is my JAM, Bethany Stevens aka Mary Mulligan. A sorely tactless Chanel O relays this news to her, which led to the slap heard around the halls of KKT.

Denise Hemphill is BACK, baby 

After 20 years on nursing KKT rejection-coated wounds, Denise is finally living in KKT as the new house mother and she means business. Dressed in Chanel#5’s Sunday’ best, including her G-string, Denise Hemphill lays down the law, which includes a little one-on-on read session with Chanel O.

Denise gave Chanel the grown woman I’ll take your man speech and I was here for it:

“I’ll just place a booty call to Chad Radwell and making him my full-time man. Mama Denise, WILL take your man.”

YAAAAASSS Hunty!   Chanel O had no choice but to take a sip of some act-right and apologize to Grace.

Another KKT Sister is Dead

Candle Vlogger is murdered while vlogging about candles, but not before she reveals a tidbit about ZayDay. Apparently ZayDay was not always Miss Popularity and was the victim of mean-girl bullying in high school. She vowed to seek revenge on all popular girls. Sounds like motive for besmirching the good name of KKT to me.

Baby Jonas is also back… sorta

Boone, donning a terrible wig and beard is beasting it out at the gym. His fellow gym members are snapping photo and video all while he is spilling the beans about the campus murders. Gigi threw a serious wrench in the plans by showing up dressed as Justice Scalia and her cohorts are not here for it. He’s wants Devil number two to kill Gigi.

Who are the killers?

I’m sticking with Gigi, Boone, and ZayDay. Throwing in those ominous images of Wes is doing nothing but make me think he is not the killer.

Quotes of the night

Chanel #5: “Why are you wearing my clothes?”

Denise: “The better question is why are you the same size as a 40-year-old woman?”

“Strap on some oat bags and poop huge green turds in the street, like the sad mares you are.” - Chanel O.