Previously on Scandal, ‘The Fluffer’ 

What happens when you get a bunch of people who are butthurt with one another together in the same room and task them with catching a terrorist? Nothing good. That’s what.

Apparently, after gripping Olivia up, Jake brought in the big dogs: Fitz and Cyrus. While the rest of OPA is put at the kid’s table and watched by Secret Service Tom, Jake accuses Olivia of treason. Fitz can’t believe she dismantled B613 without consulting… anyone. Jake wants B613 reinstated. Olivia said she made a call and she’s not going to let the possible danger her team was in and her sacrifice be for nothing. Jake says he didn’t realize having sex with him to get into his phone was a sacrifice. This is news to Fitz (and David Rosen in the other room). Yup. Jake just put all Liv’s business of Front Street and it was glorious. When Jake shows Fitz and Cyrus the photo of Maya’s lover/bomb supplier, Dominic Bell, they realize they need to call in even bigger guns.

Papa Pope strolls into OPA and immediately takes charge. Fitz warns him that this doesn’t mean he’s Command again. It just means he’s serving his country. Papa Pope is like, “Pfffft. Screw the country. Dominic Bell ruined my life.”

See? What did I tell you about people having butthurt agendas? Fitz and Cyrus head back to the White House after Fitz reluctantly agrees to remain there instead of campaigning until they find the bomb.

The party gets even more awkward when Papa Pope calls in Quinn and Charlie. Eli decides there are too many chiefs and not enough indians so if Jake stays, he goes. Olivia chooses her daddy because she doesn’t know how to pick Jake for anything. He warns her that her daddy is a hot ass mess and can’t be trusted. Then he throws up deuces and leaves. Good for you, Jake!

Leo meets with a schoolgirl who agrees to give him something in exchange for his help getting into Harvard. He promises and then she runs off to finish playing Quidditch. We learn that a senator died the night before of a heart attack and both Sally and Fitz want the honor of delivering the eulogy for political favor. Fitz remembers that he promised Olivia he’d keep his ass put in the White House, though. Mellie is drunk and drinking from a coffee cup and I’m sure it’s not coffee in there! Drunk Mellie is awesome. Drunk Mellie is all, “Whatever. Just tell me where I need to be. Until then. Laters.”

With all the modern technology going on, Ivan presents Maya with a flip phone to activate the bomb. He starts to deliver this terrifying speech about how blood will run in the streets of America and Maya is like, “Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A flip phone, though?”

Charlie wants to track the components needed to make the bomb to find Dominic and Huck wants to monitor all the cameras around his known hangouts. They look to Quinn to be the deciding vote, but she’s still ditzy Quinn deep down so Huck goes off on his own to do it his way.

Olivia wants to know more about Dominic, but Eli skirts the question. Fitz calls Olivia and mentions the senator’s funeral, but she puts her foot down. Then he wants to talk about how he doesn’t want her sleeping with Jake because he’s a selfish asshole. Mellie can’t get none. Olivia can’t get none. Sit down, Fitz! Olivia brings up the fact that it’s the 4-year anniversary of his father’s death. Way to kill the mood, Liv.

Olivia arranges for Fitz to do a bunch of satellite interviews from the White House, while Mellie, Cyrus, and Andrew work the phones. Harrison has an odd moment with Papa Pope and actually calls him Papa Pope. To his face. Is there something there? Is he Brolivia Pope? Anyway, Charlie and Quinn have no luck tracking Dominic their way, but Huck brings in Dominic bound and gagged cause Huck is a BOSS. Quinn swoons.

Jerry Jr. I mean, Jerry the III is making out with the girl who met with Leo earlier. She wants to go all the way, but she wants him to use a condom. She then delivers said used condom to Leo. Ewwwww. Leo calls Eli and says there’s a rumor that Jerry isn’t Fitz’s and he has some of Jerry’s man chowder to run a test. He needs Eli to get Fitz’s DNA. Eli agrees and then tells Olivia exactly what’s going on to prove his loyalty.

Eli wants Huck to torture Dominic for info, but Olivia reminds them that’s not how they roll at OPA. Eli finally admits that Dominic was Maya’s partner and was the one who convinced her to marry Eli for information and access. Later, Quinn tells Harrison and Abby that OPA and B613 aren’t all that different. They may not torture people at OPA, but they damn sure ruin them.

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David calls Abby to find out what he missed after he went home, but cuts the message short when he finds Jake behind his desk. After he shits his pants, he learns that Jake wants him to use a special facial recognition software to scan all the street cameras in the city for Maya. David didn’t get training on how to use the software because he was busy trying to bring down B613, but Jake has faith that David is appropriately scared enough to figure it out.

Olivia confronts Mellie, who is still drunk. Yes! Mellie asked the White House doctor to do a paternity test and he immediately snitched to Sally. Olivia assumes that one or both of Mellie’s kids is Andrew’s and Mellie lets it slip that Big Jerry is possibly the father, but doesn’t mention the rape or which child might be his. She tells Olivia to fix the Sally situation and still get her the paternity test because Olivia owes her. True dat.

Eli is tired of Dominic’s shit so he puts a gun loaded with one bullet to his head and makes him call Maya. Maya gives zero fucks about whether or not Eli kills Dominic and hangs up the phone before they can trace the call. Maya Pope ain’t never known a fuck! As Huck drags Olivia from the room, Eli shoots Dominic in the head.

Huck cleans up all the dead Dominic in the hallway while Abby takes a strand of his hair. She hands it to Papa Pope telling him he’s despicable. He calls Leo to tell him the president’s hair sample is on the way, and Abby bribes the DNA technician to tell Leo that the president’s sample (really Dominic’s) was a match for Jerry Grant. “Oh, well,” Sally says. “Can’t win them all.”

Olivia calls Jake because she’s sad that her daddy is a monster, and because she enjoys stringing poor Jake along. She tells him she did feel something when they slept together, but that she loves Fitz so it felt like betrayal. He tells her that’s a start because he’s the most patient man and she doesn’t deserve him.

The pundits are nailing Fitz for canceling all of his campaign appearances. He decides to go to Ohio after all. Olivia tells Eli that it wasn’t Dominic’s fault. Maya ruined their lives on her own. She didn’t love him, or them. She doesn’t love anyone. Meanwhile, Charlie and Huck are having a dick-measuring contest under the guise of “Who can dispose of a body the best?” Quinn is fed up with their shit and takes off with Dominic’s body on her own. Olivia finds out that Fitz is going to the rally in Ohio any damn way, and Eli tells her to go because Maya will not blow up the president if she’s there. Maya does love one person: Olivia.

Harrison finds a warehouse with all of Adnan’s evil plans, but of course she’s there and puts a gun to his head. Olivia arrives at the rally and while Fitz addresses the crowd, she tells Mellie that she took care of the situation and she will get a real paternity test done if Mellie wants it. Quinn arrives at OPA and Huck meets her in the parking garage. They have sex on the hood of her car and I just want to scrub my eyes with bleach. They’re so busy having gross sex that they don’t notice Maya waltzing into OPA. Maya tells Eli to “bring my baby home.”

Eli calls Olivia and tells her that the bomb is going to go off no matter what so she needs to book it. Olivia gets Fitz to cut the rally short citing a broken sprinkler. David shows Jake the footage of Maya and where she’s been. Jake frantically calls Liv, but she’s not answering her phone. She’s too busy finding her father bleeding on the floor of her offices. Harrison gloats to Adnan as news of the rally evacuation hits, but she tells him the bomb was never there.

Jake calls Cyrus since Liv isn’t answering and he tells him that the bomb is at the church where the senator’s funeral services are being held. Maya killed the senator so there would be a funeral! He can’t let the president go. “Good work, Ballard,” says Cyrus, forgetting that Jake killed his husband. Cyrus decides not to tell anyone about the bomb at the church because Sally is going to be there and Cyrus really wants to win this election. I mean, really wants to live. Damn, Cyrus. As Maya activates the bomb with her flip phone, Olivia cries over her dad while waiting for an ambulance.

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